• anomnom@sh.itjust.works
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      4 months ago

      Specifically ethnicities that tend to have bigger families too.

      Three Catholics that used to pump up blue numbers are all conservatives now.

  • anon6789@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    “Dad, what was I named after?”

    “I really liked those sunglasses that cops wear, and your mom likes spelling stuff weird to feel fancy, so naturally we called you Oakleigh!”

    • LOGIC💣@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      I have a red state relative who is a big sports fan and names their children after sports equipment manufacturers.

      • anon6789@lemmy.world
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        4 months ago

        I’d like you to meet my family: here’s my son Champion, my youngest, Addidas, and Riddell is the oldest. 😄

        Maybe they can get future sponsorships!

        • LOGIC💣@lemmy.world
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          4 months ago

          I’ve never really thought about it, but I think it would make it harder for them to get sponsorships.

          If your name is Nike, then would Puma really be willing to sponsor you? And if your name is Nike, then you’re already advertising for Nike. Even if Nike did sponsor you, there would be no competition so you wouldn’t be able to negotiate a bigger paycheck.

          • anon6789@lemmy.world
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            4 months ago

            I suppose a good marketer could spin it. “My name may be Nike, but you’ll only ever see these feet in Asics!”

            Someone may want to “steal them away” from their namesake brand too for the same reason. “They’re names after Nikes, but still won’t even wear them for money!”

            Advertising is weird. I’m sure if one was a star and companies saw a way to exploit that, both parties would be able to work something out.

  • ItDoBeHowItDoBe@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    What i learn from this is that there are a lot of Muslims in blue states and that everyone is naming their daughters some variation of Oakley in red states.

  • Stern@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Stetson? Like… the hat?

    Bruh.

    I suppose its better then naming their kid Fedora.

  • otp@sh.itjust.works
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    4 months ago

    Moshe? Kohen? Baylor???

    Multiple versions of “Oak”???

    I don’t understand these names

    • yogurt@lemmy.world
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      4 months ago

      Moshe is a Jewish name, Kohen is a fake Jewish name for Christian zionists, Baylor is a Christian college with a football team popular with gambling addicts.

      In the Bible the oak of righteousness will not bend, and no matter how many Olive Gardens she’s banned from Oaklynn will never bend from knowing that she wants to see the manager and you’re a slur.

    • kkj@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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      4 months ago

      Moshe is a traditional Hebrew name. It’s probably pretty much 100% NY and maybe a little NJ. That’s likely why it’s only 3% red when the rest of the most skewed names still have more than 20% in the minority.

  • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.dbzer0.com
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    4 months ago

    … Miriam is making a come back?

    Eustace! Leave that poor dog alone!

    And then also… jesus fuck, the right wing 2A crowd is now I guess just naming their kids 4 or 5 different variations of their favorite overpriced ‘cool but also tactical’ glasses?

    I guess it makes sense for a Republican approach to daughters; literally just accessories they own so they can self-actualize via consumerism and performative conformity.

    … Also I can only hope male Nico just barely making the list is from people who played GTA 4 and actually realized his entire story is a thorough evisceration of the concept of the American Dream.

  • pulsewidth@lemmy.world
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    4 months ago

    Stetson - cowboy hats.
    Briggs (& Stratton) - outboard motors.
    Oakley (in three different spellings) - redneck eyewear of choice.

    Conservatives are one generation away from naming their kids shit like Winchester, Remington, Walmart, and Budlight.

    • Coelacanth@feddit.nu
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      4 months ago

      I wish that was all the negative consequences it lead to, instead of well… *gestures broadly*

  • socsa@piefed.social
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    4 months ago

    Four different versions of shitty overpriced sunglasses favored by insecure man children? That tracks.