• jaybone@lemmy.zipEnglish
    41·
    16 days ago

    Your safe word requires two factor authentication. I hope you kept your phone handy.

    That or put a yubikey on your nipple ring.

    • chiliedogg@lemmy.world
      14·
      16 days ago

      Fun fact: I work in municipal government and they started making us use 2-factor that sent messages to our cell phones. That came back to bite us when we got an Open Records request that included a request for text messages between staff containing specific keywords. Employees who didn’t have a city-issued phone and hadn’t been using their personal phones for work got pretty upset when I had to take their phones and search their text histories.

      And that’s how every remaining employee down to the guys running the lawnmowers in the parks department got a monthly phone stipend.

      • jaybone@lemmy.zipEnglish
        10·
        16 days ago

        You mean “had been using their personal phones”? Or you had to take their personal phones regardless? In which case the phone stipend wouldn’t have mattered? Makes me think some people might just pocket the stipend and then be upset when the same thing happens again, so maybe you should just issue phones lol.

        • chiliedogg@lemmy.world
          7·
          16 days ago

          Lots of employees did keep the stipends as a pay bonus, but then it was on them if they used their personal phones for work and they got caught up in Open Records.

          I think the better solution would have been to use a different form of 2FA, but I do like having a separate work phone anyway. It makes it easier me turn it off and not get distracted by work shit when I’m off the clock, and also lets me change my number when I change cities without having my personal contacts lose my number.

    • bampop@lemmy.world
      10·
      15 days ago

      You have used the safe word correctly. Now please identify all the squares with traffic lights in them so we can email you a six digit code in order to proceed

    • SanctimoniousApe@lemmings.world
      2·
      15 days ago

      Real men are far too hard to find, anyway. They’re mostly insecure AF children overcompensating for… things. It’s always the little things that fuck everything up.

  • Pat@feddit.nu
    10·
    15 days ago

    The problem with doing the safeword like that is that it counterintuitively REDUCES entropy (you just use ! for the special character, first character’s uppercase, number at the end), and is so hard to remember it just goes on a Post-It. Get a couple dice and the EFF Large Wordlist. New Requirement: Safeword Must Have >80b Entropy.

  • kamillz
    7·
    16 days ago

    I’ve had one of those used on me once. Its really good fun

    • Gonzako@lemmy.world
      3·
      15 days ago

      How different is it from the good ol hand? I’ve never been in relationships where we’d explore anything further

      • kamillz
        3·
        15 days ago

        The sharp conars of the rj45 jacks will pierce the skin and make you bleed. It’s a very sharp pain :3

    • andros_rex@lemmy.world
      2·
      15 days ago

      Is it more stingy or thuddy? The cables seem heavy enough for a lot of thud, are the sharp corners of the end connectors stingy?

      • kamillz
        3·
        15 days ago

        The cables don’t really create that much sensation compared to the connectors. And the connectors really sting, but the sting comes a bit delayed and then ramps up

        • andros_rex@lemmy.world
          2·
          15 days ago

          Probably not too hard to make - maybe I’ll hit the thrift store and see if I can get a friend to help me test it tonight…

          • kamillz
            2·
            15 days ago

            It’s a good and wholesome craft project, I say go for it :3

  • bottleofchips
    6·
    16 days ago

    I know I shouldn’t kink shame but the fold capturing that D ring is objectively disgusting

    • MerryJaneDoe@lemmy.world
      4·
      16 days ago

      Oh…you said “fold”. Core memory triggered.

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aTkPiA9xdiE

      Yeah… Grab my terryfold flaps Grab my flappy folds Grab my terryfolds Grab my foldy flaps Hey, touch my foldy flaps Grab my terryfolds Grab my foldy holds Grab my terry flaps In my terryfolds Grab my terry flaps You gotta touch 'em… my terryfolds Grab my terryfolds Touch my holdy flaps Take a big flap Take my foldy flaps (Aaah) My terryfolds (Aaah) My foldy holds (Oooh) And my terry flaps Gotta grab my terry flaps Grab my terry flaps Squeeze my holdy folds Hold my coldy folds Grab my foldy tolds Grab my terry flap holds Grab my terryfolds Hold my foldy folds Hold my terryfolds Hey, did you ever wanna hold a terryfold? I got one right here (here) Grab my terry flap Squeeze it, grab it, squeeze and tug on my terry flap Hey, I wanna take you to the terryfold dance Wanna come with me? You can grab my holdy folds Squeeze them tight, you son of a bitch! Suck my holdy flappy folds Lick my flappy foldy holds My terry flaps in your mouth Suck my flaps you piece of shit! Fuck you (fuck you) You stupid dumb motherfucking bitch (Aaah Aaah) Hey, grab my terry flaps Gonna eat those toldy folds I gotta couple of terryfold flaps I got a flappy foldy flap I’m gonna go take you to food Gonna eat, then we’re going to the terryfold dance (dance) You and me We’re gonna go to the terryfold place It’s gonna be a night out Gonna have a real fancy time Hoo!