Specifically the younger ones here and the ones who don’t have any kids. So my mom couldn’t care less, but my dad really wants me to have a kid and says things like that I’ll have a man if I do this, or a man if I look a certain way. Here’s the thing: he knows I have a fiancée but I haven’t told him about my boyfriend because IDK how he feels about the whole poly thing. He doesn’t seem to care but he’d rather I got married/engaged to a man.
Also, he constantly talks about how I would be the perfect mother and such and he would love biological grandkids, but I can’t really have biological grandkids because both of my partners are female at birth. I don’t really want kids anyway as I don’t wanna go through the aspect of getting pregnant. He’s nonbinary, so I’m still a lesbian and he says I can be due to that and part of the reason I only date women and enbies is, besides not really wanting to date a man, is that I’ve talked to men before and several of them wanted to get me pregnant, didn’t respect my wishes, and once I was bisexual as a teenager, they ignored and tried to erase my identity and acted like I was a straight girl only capable of falling in love with him.
Now I won’t say all men are like this, because they’re not, but this has been my experience.
Sorry for ranting so much but ughhhhh
Yes, very common especially for women (from what my friends tell me). If you still have grandparents, they are usually even more blunt.
As a man, my mother has slowly started to suggest she would be interested in seeing how my children would look like. But it’s definitely less common as a conversation topic. She already has some grandchildren from my siblings as well, so the pressure is less intense.
So yes, very common and very annoying
Aww man, I get it…
Neither of my biological parents nor their current partners directly pressured me. Mom dropped hints, but no direct pressure and I think that’s fine. My living grandparents haven’t said a word about it. My in-laws asked once and haven’t brought it up again. My grandfather-in-law has directly talked to me about it (Japanese guy in his late 80s), and I would say somewhat pressured us, but not severely so. I’m in my 40s and my wife her 30s. I’ve had a vasectomy (none of the family know that), so zero chance of biological kids. Adoption looks increasingly unlikely, though never had a strong chance to begin with.
Yes.
I’m male, 23.
My family are immigrants from China to the US.
My mom is pressuing my older brother to get married.
This is a very “Traditional Chinese Culture” thing… marriage is like very important in their view.
Bro’s kinda relunctant but now he’s just going along with it.
He’s 5 years older than me. He hasn’t exactly been a great brother to me… idk how he’d manage to be a father…
They have visas to China for “visiting relatives” and they have plane tickets already booked and they’re departing next month… but I overheard them talking about marriage… so mom is literally trying to set the stage for him to meet girls lmao
She has some friends network thing that introduced him to some girl which they added each other on WeChat…
He’s weird conspiracy theroist and racial/cultural supremacist…
So yeah… good luck bro lmfao
My mom haven’t really pushed it to me yet… I guess being the 2nd child I’m just a “backup” to her lol…
I do want children tho… maybe…
My childhood was “meh” and I’d like to recreate the good aspects of it for another soul, and importantly never repeat my parents mistakes. To keep the wholesomeness alive in the world.
The money aspect is gonna be crutial in my decision…
If I don’t get inheritance… I don’t think I would be doing this… kids are expensive… economy is stuggling…
If I do get my half of the inheritance… then the money element is checked off the list and then I’d have to evaluate if I’d be a good father…
I think the issue is finding someone I like and compatible with…
Aww, man, I’m sorry to hear. My mom is a lot more liberal and “do what you want” than my conservative dad, but yeah. It’s really annoying being a lesbian and all and only being into non-binary people and women and just having my dad want me to date a man and have kids. Plus, he thinks “Oh, but you were into a trans woman, a male, once, so that makes you straight or at least bi”.
