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My cousin Constantius jerked off in public once. True story. He was on a pilgrimage to Mt Vesuvius when all of the sudden the mountain went. The ground started shaking around, going out of control. So he decides it’s all over and whips it out and starts beating it right there.
Well, did he cum, or what?
Jesus Christ, man. There’s just some things you don’t talk about in public.
What if that guy offended the gods by jerking it, and so the gods cursed him and said if you ever jerk it again, the entire city will be destroyed, and everyone will know it was you?
Almost 2000 years later and we still know. Lol
This is how I want to die, cranking my hog while maintaining intense eye contact with the grim reaper.
Best. Best pose.
They came together
