Courtney (she/her/they)

Hello lovelies, I am a (trans)Woman who is still in the process of discovering herself!

I have been working up the courage to be who I am for so long, I am excited to be figuring things out.

Pre-HRT, pre-fashion-sense, and pre-confidence.

Any and all tips and advice from more experienced women are welcome!

  • 3 Posts
  • 88 Comments
Joined 8 days ago
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Cake day: April 10th, 2026

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  • Courtney (she/her/they) OPtoTransfemDaily Voice Training
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    49 minutes ago

    Yeah, I’m using it as more of a pitch guide, I’ve got a guitar tuner so I could totally just use that, but I already had the app and it’s convenient with graphs and such, so I’ll use it.

    I’d love to get a couple afternoons with a voice trainer, that would be FAR more effective than an app.

    Heck, even a couple videos of trans women going over voice training exercises in a voice I feel I can emulate is better.


  • Courtney (she/her/they) OPtoTransfemDaily Voice Training
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    1 hour ago

    I use an app called VoiceTools

    It’s icon has a microphone and pastel blue/pink trans flag motif in the background.

    It has a lot of things on it I haven’t even opened yet but one of the options will have you read a couple paragraphs and then at the end it will show you the stuff in the screenshot.

    I use android, not sure if it’s available elsewhere.


  • I have been using KT tape to keep the girls tucked away and keep everything smooth. Whenever I do get an incident, the tape keeps everything from shifting too much, but if I’m out walking around and it happens I will have to stop or the movement could push things in a direction I don’t want to go…

    I have looked into different cages but I really like having a super smooth panty line and none of the cages seem like they’ll work with my anatomy and give me the smooth feeling I want.

    TMI warning:

    <spoiler title>

    I have a “grower” so she’s usually around 3-5cm depending on temperature (more like 1-2 if it’s early in the swimming season and I’m in the pool) and when things happen she gets to about 10-13cm. The twins tuck up or fall down depending on temperature. Also since I’m a little hefty (170cm/100kg) things are already a little crowded.

    So because of the way I am shaped, it either would fall off, the fat around it would make it not sit right, or it just wouldn’t give me the ability to wear my leggings.

    I would LOVE to find one that makes me flat enough to wear my leggings and still stay on.

    Also I’m glad you have a supportive partner in this aspect, my own partner thinks that’s pushing too far into “it’s a fetish” territory and I can’t seem to make her understand what looking down and seeing something I feel shouldn’t be there does to me. Yes, to some chastity might be a fetish, but for me it’s a means to control my own flesh just a little better. They know I prefer to be smooth, but they don’t seem to connect how visibly having a bulge makes me uncomfortable. The tape is probably their line for now, but it takes awhile go put on and make sure it’s comfortable. This week is the first week I’ve been able to wear it all day while walking and sitting.

    I have seen some people put a small cotton makeup pad looking thing in the head of their cage, as a way to make it more comfortable to wear. Maybe that might help, but it might also make things worse for you with the extra rubbing.

    I’m having a hard time working out where the “puddle” you mentioned would be, but perhaps wearing a pair of panties the next size down would help?

    Idk dear I’m sorry I can’t be of more help 🙁

    I hate having to tip-toe around chaser spaces especially when I’m still new to trying to be part of communities and still unsure where they all are, and sadly any kind of talk like this is bound to draw them in.

    I’m glad you’re finding something that works well for you though! You go girl! 😘

    (ps where did you get your cage?)

    And please please please feel free not to answer:

    <spoiler>

    A simple yes or no will do if you aren’t comfortable talking about it, ut are you at all similar to myself down there, based on my above TMI spoiler? I just would like to hear from someone similar in type/size to me when dealing with such things

    for awhile I’ve been lamenting that nobody has gone through the trouble of making a database for trans women to input clothing sizes they find comfortable and their measurements. I would love to be able to find clothing without having to trial and error everything and a 5ft9 220lb trans woman isn’t exactly common around these parts…









  • I am getting the same way, although it’s probably less intense since my egg only cracked fairly recently…

    I have spent so much on women’s clothing the last week and a half, I want to go out looking cute and wearing what I want, but I live with transphobes who would kick me out if they knew, so every day they’re awake and I come home, I have to keep a pair of sweat pants and a baggy shirt because I don’t want to take off my bra, my underwear, or even my leggings/tights/jeans just to walk 50 ft past windows, inside, and to the door that separates the sections of the house…

    I haven’t gone out to places where I know someone my family knows might be, and definitely not in crowded stores yet, but walking around downtown in small stores, parks, bars with other trans friends… I’ve been loving it. I want to dress how I want 24/7 without the stupid self-conscious feelings related to not looking like how I feel and not sounding how I want.

    At least while home I can stay in my own areas and wear all the cute things I’ve been getting lately. still haven’t found shoes that fit, and I don’t want to order online for footwear but that’s neither here nor there…

    I definitely feel what you’re going through, boymode sucks ass, but talking about it definitely helps me, so if you need to vent about anything, we are all here to listen!

    You got this girl, you can kick dysphoria’s ass!


  • Me, up until a few weeks ago!

    34, myself. I lucked out with a partner that’s going through similar self-discovery and they’re bisexual so as long as I’m the same person, they don’t care how I present myself.

    I have been looking into gender affirming care nearby and I would have to drive an hour away just for an appointment, and I’m looking at probably around $500 for the first appointments and prescription, which is about 1/3 my savings account… So it’s been a Rollercoaster of emotions.

    Hopefully you have some kind of support structure around you to help you through your own Rollercoaster! If you can find some local LGBT groups, check them out! They’re great for resources and just general friendship! I had about 10 people join me at the park for hammocking a few weeks ago, and all of them were from the group.


  • I finally started voice training again this morning and holy crap I do not like putting effort in because it reminds me of how far I am from sounding remotely feminine… I might have cried a lil lol

    I really need some one-on-one time with someone who can teach me and give me pointers for exercises. I can read 10,000 articles, blog posts, forum comments, and the like, but 1 hour with someone interactive who can literally see/feel my throat as I speak would be waaaaaaaay more beneficial.

    I went thrifting yesterday and the other people ended up getting busy so it was just my partner and I, and I let them do all the speaking. The one or two times I did say anything it was just a small squeak of “thanks” and “sorry” and a couple "mhmm"s.

    I’m hoping I can power through the emotions…

    Reading other people’s experiences is definitely a good thing for me, so thank you so much for sharing! I’m hoping I can have the same positive attitude soon



  • Courtney (she/her/they) toTrans MemesHorror
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    1 day ago

    Girl, same!

    I also used to sing and losing my upper range over the years has been a source of a lot of crying (edit, started trying to train about 5 minutes ago, cannot continue through emotions. Yay dysphoria!) . I started hating hearing myself in the monitors or just reflected back by the walls, so just starting is making me feel anxious…

    The executive dysfunction makes it worse, but it’s probably more of an excuse for me… I want the voice I had on highschool.

    You know, when I used to pretend to be a girl over voice chat to try and get thirsty guys to buy me things, and sometimes “just to practice so it’s more convincing to scam thirsty guys”… That I was sure every cis guy did…

    Jesus christ I ignored so many things…


  • Courtney (she/her/they) OPtoTransfemMy outfit today!
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    2 days ago

    It claims to be waterproof, but I wouldn’t trust it to get wet, it feels fairly “not sealed” if that makes sense. Things with decent waterproofing tend to feel more solid with all the seals and things.

    I might be able to get it to work in the shower if i am careful to keep water away from it. Honestly I should have just forked up the extra money to get a halfway decent one… That’s on me.

    I’ve heard of “sugaring” but never looked into it. It sounds messy.

    My partner’s wax kit is a hard wax kit that I’ve used on them a handful of times. It’s easy to come off the skin when it cools, but at this point I would have to wait like 2 weeks to have enough hair to use it… I just am a bit of a whimp when it comes to voluntary pain. I can deal with literally being stabbed until I get to a hospital, but start pulling my arm hairs and I’ll cry… Pain is weird lol

    I’m still getting a skin care routine figured out, But I’m sure I will get the hang of it eventually. This is just the first time I’ve decided I’m going to stick to things long term…


  • I only remembered because my partner has one from college chilling somewhere around here. You couod even practice on all the “to burn” shirts!

    Lol I’m not sure where you live, but here in rural Ohio, smack in the middle (ish) of the US, I’d definitely consider this area a “backwards shithole”, compared to some many places. Then again, I still have access to gender affirming care even if I have to pay out of pocket, so I suppose I’m not bad off. Can’t imagine how much it must suck to live in some countries though…


  • I’d be afraid I’d fuck something up and injure myself somehow but depending on how the next few weeks go, I might shoot you a DM to get in contact.

    The most secure way I have is my signal account, I keep PIN turned on, only “new message” for a notification (idk if android has the same issue I phones had recently with signal notifications being stored but just in case…)



  • Courtney (she/her/they) OPtoTransfemMy outfit today!
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    2 days ago

    It’s great! I had a choice between this one and one that said “Trans Rights Are Human Rights” and someone else really wanted that one. I was already leaning toward this one since it fits my attitude perfectly. “If they don’t like it they can get fucked, this is who I am and their phobias won’t change that”


  • Courtney (she/her/they) OPtoTransfemMy outfit today!
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    2 days ago

    I’ve never had sensitive skin before, so it’s odd. I’m sure I just need to power through. I got a little unsure about it and the prickly feeling on my legs was killing me so I just used depilatory cream again…

    When they get long enough to use the epilator again I’ll try some more. For now I’m also checking to see how long it takes the bumps to go away. I did some as a test 3 days ago, then some more 2 days ago. Last night I used the cream and this morning the bumps are still there but nearly gone. Some aren’t just bumps, it’s fully a tiny scab :(

    Maybe I just bought a cheap one? I know they get expensive, I’m not shelling out $160 for it though…

    My skincare routine consists of “use the moisturizing lotion I got for free” and “foaming exfoliating body scrub” in the shower. So basically nonexistent 😂 I definitely need to get into one though but have no idea where to start. I love how smooth my legs feel after taking care of the hair and using lotion though. I had girlfriends in the past who would rub their legs obsessively after shaving and now I understand why!