You should end things with Nicole if you’re planning to continue your relationship to Max. It’s not fair to her or her feelings for you to be acting this way behind her back.

This sort of half in / half out thing is emotional cheating. She’s not poly. You can’t be looking for that type of emotional connection with another person while maintaining a relationship with Nicole.

I feel that whatever I’m focused on is what the medication amplifies for me. I don’t have that type of sensation that you’re getting OP, but if I’m wanting something it does enhance that to be a bit more a need for me.

I find that putting something else that I could like, in front of me, helps to placates my cravings though. So I might want to eat sweets or play games all day for instance, but if I put something else in front of myself I can get absorbed in that other thing such as reading or a hobby of mine.