I mean, I couldn’t use it even when it had like 75% of the oil left, it didn’t seem like it was intended to be thrown away that quickly

My brain seems to wander when high - I find it hard to concentrate, and every single thought is so expansive - it can make it both enjoyable and also very difficult to read a book, for example. Everything is so suggestive, and makes a deeper impression.

I can also get easily paranoid and anxious on cannabis - like I can get really scared that I won’t know how to breathe right or that my tongue could suddenly choke me, etc. but also just like … paranoid about other people and their intentions - I’ll read a book and little ambiguities in the interpretation of the author’s words can get me paranoid about whether the author is being ironic, or lying to me, or if they’re being sincere or not, etc.

Weird thoughts.

I dunno, I’ve felt like full body geometric recursively folding-into-itself-and-expanding floral heart waves that felt like the immense happiness and love that I have for everyone in the world - but that was more like a feeling than a thought …

I took 2 doses of a CBD tincture earlier in the day, which really cuts down on the paranoia for me - I haven’t had much paranoia, but I definitely feel more “spooked” and easily can get pulled into paranoid-adjacent feelings (I have to be a bit more careful about my headspace)

In terms of cravings - I was cooking this pesto pasta earlier, and it did not turn out great, so I’m craving good pesto pasta 😭 You know it’s bad when you don’t enjoy it despite being both hungry and high 😄

I think the pasta needs way more salt, and I think it needs more and better pesto, tbh - it tastes bland.

And there are a bunch of leftovers, too 🙈

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ah, yes - that’s the phrase ✅ I wish there were more research on biochemical dysphoria, I feel like the evidence for it right now is mostly anecdotal - I don’t think there is any cognitive science that sheds light on why hormones might do this (or even that they really do)

I found that the presence of T is mostly the issue for me, but I do think high levels of E do make me happy. Post-op, when my E gets low I no longer have the depression symptoms I had pre-op (probably from T coming back?), but when I inject I do feel high usually (esp. if my levels dropped low enough), and I can find E can make me more moody in general - the lows are lower, the highs are higher.

😍 💖 💞 🌄

this gives me goosebumps

very lovely, thank you 🫶

I’ve been so high I significantly struggled to coordinate moving my limbs, very difficult head spaces - tbh I find cannabis much less psychologically safe than other psychedelics like psilocybin

it is sorta hard to do, tho

hungry af, I’ve been cooking this pesto pasta dish and it smells so good 🤤

I don’t normally use disposables or oil, but I just moved across state lines and had to get rid of all my normal gear - I normally would only lightly vape flower using a desktop vape and a water bong, and then use the ABV for edibles later.

this disposable pen is just until I can replace all my gear 🤞

probably the king of hearts because he shoved a sword through his head

and I had to get rid of all my gear when I moved, so I lost my water bongs and desktop flower vape - I need to buy everything again, but now I have no money, lol - so … maybe for a birthday some year I’ll be able to get back to flower?

blood tests are pretty important, but it’s only every 3 months at the beginning - after a year or so I think it’s more like once every 6 - 12 months.

And being underage does make it difficult, it depends on how responsible & mature you are and how much you can educate yourself on whether DIY makes sense without blood tests, but that’s the alternative to getting HRT from a doctor and doing blood tests. You can always then see a doctor once you’re of age.

However, your mom may notice your transition, so don’t expect that to last forever. I would give yourself around a year of boymoding, maybe less or more depending on your genetics, etc.

but don’t count on never being out with your family unless you happen to never see them again

because they’re five

I usually use a tincture, but edibles fuck me up for hours and it’s a lot harder to control how high I am during the session (I can get too high, and it can increase distress; or I can be still waiting for the come-up - and this depends not just on how much I took, how long I held it under my tongue, and when I took it, but also when I last had a meal or whether I took it before or after a meal, etc.)

whereas hitting a cart lets me control it much better and doesn’t leave me disabled later

best tofu prep I’ve learned is from Bryant Terry Vegan Soul Kitchen which describes a method by which you press tofu (as always), then you bake the tofu in an oven for an hour

it’s the long cooking time that really helps the flavors from a marinade or spice-rub penetrate - it works better than marinading overnight in the fridge (I find the flavors don’t really penetrate the tofu as well).

I either put it in a covered dutch oven when I want a softer and more wet product, or I put it in my toaster oven when I want a crispier outcome, but in both cases I’m baking at a lower temp for a long time - maybe 300 - 350F for 30 - 60 minutes (usually longer is better, if in the dutch oven, I often will flip the tofu after 30 minutes, then bake another 30 minutes with the lid off).

currently struggling to cook this pesto pasta dish - I got the potatoes sliced! 🙌

whoa, that’s nice 👀

yeah, I’ve been using that forward-tongue hard-suck to clear it in the past, but it’s getting harder and harder (to the point where my mouth hurts like minutes afterwards), and now sometimes after I suck, there is all this sticky stuff that comes up and gets all over the pen - very annoying

I also have found a toothpick hasn’t helped, so I wasn’t sure if there was some trick to this 😅 or is this just a really shitty product and I should have known better?

yeah, the UK and the US have both gotten much worse since this map was made. Trump hadn’t won his second term yet in 2023 🫠

I largely agree with this, laws are second to the real-feel of how people are on the ground, though they can relate to one another. Where I used to live, it was legal to discriminate against trans people regarding housing and so on, but where I live now, I know it’s illegal and the culture is different here as well. I’m not in the biggest city area, and it’s still much better - so sometimes better laws do track better culture, too.

Either way, yes - laws won’t really protect you, they just might protect you in certain legal matters and give you recourse for justice if you are wronged (in some places).