just start them on Steel Ball Run and when they inevitably realize it’s peak you can be like “well it’s an alternate universe but if you liked that there’s a ton more”

bottoms would never lose on purpose. no, definitely not, never happened before

no more? no, more!

I mean, I feel pretty lazy after 2 at my job, so maybe we should just implement a ban on it for all afternoons.

and hey, sometimes I’m a little groggy in the mornings, so maybe let’s ban it then too.

this is why I don’t look at my phone at all when I get off work. I save all my shitposting for my salaried hours

sorry I can only identify by taste

just started waxing my legs again. I thought I was safe because it’s almost spring and last weekend it was like 70°F.

now it’s gonna snow this weekend. 🥶

“But if you sting me,” said the frog, “we both will drown.”

“lol,” said the scorpion, “lmao.”

150ml of what? of what?!

currently have a stack of students’ academic records on my desk, the state of grading in the U.S. is just insane. I hate GPA with a burning passion. Very talented kids burn themselves out over a number that might as well be set arbitrarily, because schools do some very fucky math to inflate their numbers, and they all seem to do the math differently. Why do they do this math? Well, it’s because they’re allergic to giving out grades lower than a C, so their entire scale would cease to function if they didn’t heavily weight different classes over others. It’s like a tower of self-caused problems.

ketchup doesn’t belong anywhere. it’s a C-tier condiment at best

this may come as a shock, but things have dramatically changed in the last 105 years

unfortunately, being familiar with the game, no it’s toxic af. It’s debateable if Nicole has any feelings at all toward Ari beyond just the personal gratification of treating her poorly.

One of the routes has Nicole bullying Ari so hard that Ari decides to date men again because Nicole has ruined her on the concept of dating women, and Nicole’s kinda just proud of it.

probably won’t be able to find out how your own brain is structured without getting a scan, but your local university neuroscience lab might be interested in a free test subject and would give you a scan in exchange for studying your brain.

it’s a bit of a “chicken and egg” problem, but yes studies show that conservatives typically have an overactive amygdala. now, is it overactive because they’re conservative, or are they conservative because it’s overactive? hard to say.

I dunno if it was the best, but the pizza that lives in my memory was a whopping 24" pizza from a local place. That’s over 450 square inches of 'za, or 11 square meters for the Europeans.

It was glorious, and took four incredibly high stoners about a day and a half to work through.

and what’s wrong with that!

clearly the market simply needs more blood. time to chuck a few hundred kids into the orphan grinder 5000

hate me and you want me dead

she’s perfect