• Lucidlethargy@sh.itjust.works
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    1 year ago

    On behalf of California, we accept this proposal, and we accept Canada as our new federal government.

    I also propose we officially refer to the remainder of the US as “Dumbfuckistan”.

  • isyasad@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Accepting pleas from other comments here, Canada could get away with about this. And if they have the whole Pacific border, I’ll also throw in Hawaii for free.

      • prole
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        1 year ago

        You’d have to create a corridor through Southern Idaho and Northern Utah to join the new state of “New Mexirado” with the rest if you removed Arizona… Hard work, but I believe it could be done.

    • FanciestPants@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Hm. Went with cutting Washington and Oregon in half rather than full take. Pretty bold, but makes some sense.

      • Baguette@lemm.ee
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        1 year ago

        Theres citylife washington and middle of nowhere washington. Occasionally middle of nowhere washington likes to throw fits in the city to support trump because they have nothing better to do

        Though i guess that goes with cali as well. Lots of the non cities in the west coast just really love trump despite reaping all the state benefits that are very non-republican.

    • prettybunnys@sh.itjust.worksBanned
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      1 year ago

      Listen.

      MD will take Pennsylvania and bring it into new Canadania as long as we can bring West Virginia with us too.

      They’re dumb but they’re our dumbs.

      • prole
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        1 year ago

        You don’t wan the middle of PA… Maybe if they just turn everything between Philadelphia and Pittsburgh into a weapons testing site? Turn it into “no man’s land” like it was always mean to be.

    • leadore@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      A couple tweaks: Include Illinois and the eastern part of Pennsylvania. (edit: I see you did get Chicago, maybe just go a bit further south?).

  • buzz86us@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Oh man I’d love to see the civil unrest in the red States when they don’t have us new Yorkers to give them their welfare payments.

    • Baguette@lemm.ee
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      1 year ago

      Same from the west coast. If only cali oregon and washington could just be a west coast alliance separate from the rest of the problem states.

  • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.zip
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    1 year ago

    If you go by recent province/state wide election results:

    Alberta, Saskatchewan and probably Manitoba go to Jesusland.

    … And Colorado and New Mexico, and Illinois become exclaves like Kaliningrad.

    CO+NM is exceptionally fucked because its landlocked, and almost in a Lesotho situation (being wholly surrounded by a single other country) were it not for Mexico…

    Though I guess Illinois would not be much better off as Jesusland would likely claim it owns all of Lake Michigan beyond 50 miles of Illinois’ shore.

    And Virginia actually went for Harris, so that’s also part the United States of Canada.

    • DaddleDew@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Actually, only 19% of Albertans would want to join the US according to this poll . I’m surprised too. It really looks like these people are a loud minority. Or that at least being more conservative doesn’t necessarily mean wanting to become part of the US.

      • Pyr@lemmy.ca
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        1 year ago

        There might be more than 19% of Canadians who want Alberta to join the US lol

      • sp3ctr4l@lemmy.zip
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        1 year ago

        Im going by functional votes for a conservative head of state, not wanting to join another country… or seceede, cough Quebec cough Texas cough.

      • VieuxQueb@lemmy.ca
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        1 year ago

        Probably all the same town groups. I wonder what is the lead level in those water.

    • Maple Engineer@lemmy.worldBanned
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      1 year ago

      -Life expectancy will go up from a world ranking of 48th (USA) to 20th (Canada).

      -Education will get better from 31st (USA) to 19th (Canada).

      -Math scores will improve from 34th (USA) to 9th (Canada).

      -Robberies will go down from 98 per 100,000 population to 62.

      -Traffic accident deaths will drop from 12.7 per 100,000 to 5.3.

      -You will spend half as much on health care yet get better outcomes.

      -Poverty in Canada is 1/3 the rate in the USA.

      -Although Canada has fewer millionaires, we more fairly distribute wealth (better income equality).

      -The minimum wage in Canada is double that in USA.

      and most important you will be happier (Canada ranked 15th, USA 23rd in happiness).

      (We couldn’t find a politeness index, but thank you for reading)

      • prole
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        1 year ago

        Imagine how much worse all of those statistics will get once they absorb large chunks of the US!

        • Maple Engineer@lemmy.worldBanned
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          1 year ago

          I can assure you that the vast majority of Canadians are well aware of that fact and totally disinterested in become part of the US or taking on any part thereof.

          Americans joining Canada would have to give up their guns and other weapons, compete that training and licensing processes, and if successful would have the revocable and modifiable privilege of owning a very small selection of approved guns. They would have to accept that religious freedom in Canada, which is much higher than in the US, means that you are free to practice your religion in any way you choose as long as it doesn’t effect anyone else’s rights and you are free to have no religion at all. They would have to accept that it is settled law in Canada that a woman’s healthcare decisions are between her and her healthcare provider and none of anyone else’s business. They would have to accept that everyone has the right to marry, has had the right for decades, and that the only thing destroy traditional marriage is traditionally married people. They would have to accept that free speech in Canada does not include racism or hate speech. Most Americans would not fit in in Canada and we are not interested in becoming Americans and giving up the things that make us the best country in the world.

        • Goodmorningsunshine@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          Not really. Canada’s getting all the states that are doing the heavy lifting in those shitty numbers. If not for them, every metric would be worse.

      • pressanykeynow@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        Wouldn’t you get most of the millionaires and billionaires by including California and New York and the stats will start going to the US level or worse?

        • Maple Engineer@lemmy.worldBanned
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          1 year ago

          Canada is 85 per 100,000 and the US is 146 per 100,000. Canada is a world leader in Corrections. We are focused on rehabilitation and reintegration. That’s why whenever there is a breakdown of a government Correctional Service Canada is on the Nation Building team that the UN sends in to help rebuild. I worked at CSC for 25 years and knew a guy who was on the UN plane that crashed in Kosovo during the Nation Building exercise there.

    • Snapz@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Is this an unlabeled bad joke that’s too close to what an actual idiot would say in real life?

  • UltraGiGaGigantic@lemmy.ml
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    1 year ago

    Solving the problem is dissolving all borders so the working class isn’t divided into easily managed nation states.

  • lambalicious@lemmy.sdf.org
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    1 year ago

    Excuse me but that incorporation of California, Oregon, Washington and British Columbia gets in the way of the glorious Long Chile Project. We shall be having words.

    (By all means do take MN, CT and WDC tho.)

  • DankOfAmerica@reddthat.com
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    1 year ago

    lol @ New Hampshire

    Also, that would be about 37% of the US economy. California making the highest percentage at 14% of the US economy while New York would be in 2nd place at 8%. The least impactful would be Vermont with 0.2% (for got to include Rhode Island). However, I think this would wreck the world economy with the financial hub of the US (New York City) who manages the investments of world’s reserve currency (dollar) would switch from US Dollar to Canadian Dollar. The US would also lose access to the Pacific and a considerable amount of military force stationed in the West Coast states.

    • Donkter@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Not to mention half of the important US ports. The states left would face a harsh reality when everything tripled in price as all the goods that used to be subsidized by the rich states are now hit with import taxes as well.

    • adarza@lemmy.ca
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      1 year ago

      lol @ New Hampshire

      fuckyouinparticular

      The US would also lose access to the Pacific

      donvict’s gonna invade panama to take the canal back, remember? nbd.

      • hovercat
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        1 year ago

        I can tell you that a large part of that was as a spite non-vote against Harris due to her not speaking up against Israel. Less about supporting Agent Orange, and more about not supporting the genocide of Palestinians by the very large arab and Muslim population in SE Michigan.

        • PrettyFlyForAFatGuy@feddit.uk
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          1 year ago

          spite non-vote

          lol… well that non-vote got you a president who is absolutely going to be a lot worse for Palestinians than Harris.

          I had and observed several arguments with single issue Palestinian crisis “voters” who flat out refused to hold their nose and vote for the obviously less damaging candidate before the election.

          so sit and spin, if you are an American and either didn’t vote, or you voted for trump; you have nothing to say worth listening to…

          I’m sure all the dead Palestinians will thank you while Trump is pouring petrol on the genocide fire

    • adhocfungus@midwest.social
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      1 year ago

      As somebody from Wisconsin I will say that I don’t approve of us being excluded, but I also can’t blame them.

  • Snapz@lemmy.world
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    1 year ago

    Is the US losing just about all of the top universities in this “trade”?

    • Snowclone@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Losing CA alone would make the US possibly not even a world power. NY and CA gone, the US Would be a thing no one really has a reason to think of talk about. Suddenly all the movies would be about aliens landing on Canada or blowing up Canadian national landmarks.

        • Snowclone@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          It’s never worked and never will, that’s the whole point of the Civil War. The military wouldn’t just sit back and do nothing, and states that try to leave wouldn’t have a professionally outfitted military. My opinion, if anyone really tried, a few handcuffs would end their attempts.

    • Veneroso@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      Nobody’s going to go there after abortion is banned.

      Nobody wants their prince or princess saddled with that.