I wish I could have transitioned as a kid. I fantasized about my puberty magically being the girl puberty, that my parents made some mistake and I was really a girl. I hoped every day I would start growing boobs… I never had the vocabulary or understanding to verbalize any of it, and I had such a warped idea of what trans people were I thought it was obvious I wasn’t one of them. The disquiet never went away. Hating myself and my body never went away. I tried so fucking hard to be a man, but nothing I ever did made it feel right. That was the life of someone who didn’t know what was happening, and I know now it would have been exponentially worse if I had, because I felt that after my egg finally cracked in my 30s. Just a few extra months of waiting was almost unbearable. I can’t imagine going through that as a kid, knowing I’m going through the wrong puberty, watching my body change in all the wrong ways while my parents gaslight me saying it’s for my own good it’s just a phase I’ll grow out of. People who do that to their children are scum who don’t deserve to be parents.