When I was a kid/teenager, I absolutely loved books. II mostly read fantasy (I started with Harry Potter (oh the irony), then went on to Markus Heitz Fantasy universes and ended up with Robert Joardans Wheel of time) and (psycho-)thrillers (mostly Sebastian Fitzek). I read the same books over and over and over. I spent almost all of my free time reading. I was reading so insanely fast, that I could easily read over 300 pages on a single day. One thing that kept annoying the hell out of me back then was, that while reading I somewhat regularly had this “experience”, where my vision would “zoom out”. Everything looked much smaller than normally and like it was much further away from my point of view, than it normally is. At the same time it got incredibly hard to focus on something. I could read a book, but I did not comprehend what was standing on the pages.
All of this made reading while having this “experience” basically impossible which annoyed the hell out of me (what else should I do, if I could not read). Just recently did I realize, that this is literally the definition of dissociation.
Before I realised this, I thought, that the earliest signs of me being trans occured at the age of 14 (or around that time), but I experienced this kind of dissociating at least since the age of 10.
That king of thing got a name btw. Look up Alice in Wonderland syndrom or Alice in Wonderland-like syndrom.
I believe I’ve had this experience and recently. That ain’t disassociation, that’s just your brain’s reading circuitry going on strike. It means its time to take a break and touch grass.
I have experienced disassociation independently of that. I used to call it zombie mode before I had the language.
The reason I believe that this was in fact dissociation is, since I had that same experience again recently, and this was 100% dissociation.
That definitely is dissociation
No, I think its something else. Because it can happen independently of the whole out of body experience thing. Like disassociation is a very specific sense of nothing being real, wheras the hallucinations of text changing size can happen with or without the accompanying sense of… wrongness
Dissociation doesn’t require anything “out of body”, and changes in perception aren’t necessarily hallucinations
I used to get something similar where kind of the color would drain out of the world and everything slowed down. Oh, and feeling like I was moving the road under my feet while I stayed still while walking.
ADHD doesn’t help with reading either :3
