In 2030: Yes, I ate a few children, but I didn’t eat YOU.
If God didn’t want us to eat children, why did he make them so damn delicious?
“What’s the charge? Eating a child? A succulent human child?”
I mean, who didn’t? Can any of you really say you haven’t eaten a child? It had immigrant parents, so it’s fine.
I ate a few children, but none of them are alive anymore.
President Clavicular could eat a child on Ocean Drive and lot lose any votes.
In 2040: Yes, we have a library of the genetic material of almost every child, from which we create a clone each night to eat the next day - but I only eat originals if I’m feeling really peckish!
Conservatives in 1998: The president told a lie, impeach.
Conservatives in 2028: Trump said it’s legal for him to run again, and I have no reason not to believe him. Honest guy, tells it like it is.
Really, it’s more like:
Conservatives in 1998: The president told a lie, impeach.
Almost every member of Congress in 2026: The president raped children, but it was with a rich friend, and I like money, so it’s really not a big deal. Plus, they were girls, which…c’mon - who’s going to take that seriously?
Name a single US Congress member that thinks Trump raped kids and is okay with it.
Now I’m debating whether Republican politicians are as dumb as their followers…
Ron Johnson
Then take the first 50 members on this list, maybe 75. Maybe 200. Money makes people fine with some pretty terrible stuff. https://www.govtrack.us/congress/members/report-cards/2024/house/ideology
Okay. Let’s just start with Ron Johnson.
I can’t find any evidence or quotes of him talking about Trump having raped minors.
Any Trump supporter ever say they believe Trump had sex with minors? Or are you just assuming that every Republican believes Trump raped minors? Because that’s what it seems like, and that defies reality.
First time shitposting about politics, huh?
https://www.politico.com/news/2023/12/15/republicans-dont-always-like-trump-publicly-its-a-different-story-00132123 https://www.thenation.com/article/politics/republicans-against-trump-election/ https://www.thedailybeast.com/republicans-secretly-fuming-with-trump-as-midterm-disaster-looms/
Expecting something public is right up there with expecting UFO/alien disclosure.
Given that none of the three articles directly address the request, this implies a retraction.
It implies nothing - I’m explaining with evidence that politicians don’t say everything they think, and are, in fact, afraid to say anything against Trump publicly because it means they might lose their seats or money.
I am spoon-feeding you this. Denial on your part implies willful ignorance or being the worst wannabe troll on Lemmy.
not really conservative anymore, more regressive than anything.
Conservatives in 2029: sure Trump fucked and ate a baby on live TV, but they said it was a woke trans commie baby so it’s fine
And the Qanon Pizzagate people are nowhere to be found when they would be the loudest people online about this issue.
they only care about it as long as it’s a conspiracy
same as how republicans only care about the “wellbeing of children” as long as they aren’t already born
I mean it is a conspiracy, a conspiracy to rape and eat children. Just because it’s real doesn’t mean it’s not a conspiracy, it’s just a factual one, not a theory.
qanon was the only “theory” involved. we KNEW about epstein by the time pizzagate started. he was arrested under Bush. the prosecution just took that long.
the conspiracy theories around this were all wrong and intentionsl misdirection about a real active case. they didn’t Crack anything. the whole thing was horse shit. the pedo ring was already public knowledge.
I remember the days when we criticized the president for wearing tan suits and eating the wrong type of mustard
And the helmet. Don’t forget that he looked weak, because he was wearing a bicycle helmet, while riding a bicycle.
He’s saluting while holding a coffee! rwyhersdhfshagsdfsdfakl!$@#%
That the kind of shit I wish I could’ve gotten away with in the Marines. Saluting with a hot dog would have been peak American.
I’m seeing Private Pyle from Full Metal Jacket.
And the drone strikes
Those always were just code for criticizing his skin color.
*raped
Fucking children is always rape. But rape doesn’t necessarily require fucking.
Spoiler: they did in fact eat the child after raping her and forcing her to give birth to a baby who they also raped and murdered but Americans didn’t care enough to overthrow this regime so other children are getting raped and eaten as we speak
A few years ago, I read Marquis de Sade’s 120 Days of Sodom. It was one of the most important books I’ve read because it gave me a new perspective on the depths of human evil. Did not expect to see the Epstein files be such a faithful reenactment…
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Why are you against eating children? It should be fine as long as they are killed humanely and you use all body parts right?
It should be fine as long as they are killed humanely and you use all body parts right?
It’s much too modest a proposal. Scandalous for a politician, given that they need to keep up appearances. It would reflect poorly on the country if the leaders seemed poor.
Jonathan Swift entered the chat
Soylent green has been on the market for years now and no one complains.
It’s people!
How does it taste?
Canonically not very good, but with the right chef who knows!
I’ve heard it varies from person to person.
Let me guess, you are vegan?
Fund my diet, and I will stop eating animals 😛
Username checks out
I bet he did eat them.
If he said he didn’t, that’s essentially as good as a confession from him.
Everything is about
sexthe kids, exceptsexthe kids.SexThe kids is about power.Trump had to fuck and eat that kid. He was busting the libs and not fucking kids would have blown his cover
-maga, eventually
Nah fuck this guy though. He is not an ‘agorist’. He is a simp for fascism and wants to round leftists up and put them in camps.
Eating them is much less bad.
Catch and release. There’s always next year to think about…
Those are both bubba
