Why can’t the therapist just be a gay [opposite gender] then too, hmm?
I was asked the same thing by the professor who I had to see to get a referral to a gender clinic. It’s policy if you have a diagnosis. Found out later that this clown had been instrumental in creating trans care policy in this country.
He suggested that the reason for me “thinking I was trans” was that I couldn’t handle being gay and had to become a woman to legitimize being with men. Transitioning obviously being the easier option since us trans girls are so universally loved and respected.
In the second meeting we had I pointed to my genitals and said that these have to go. Dude looked super annoyed but that was it, the meeting was over and I got my referral.
Transitioning obviously being the easier option since us trans girls are so universally loved and respected.
I can get it on some level, growing up surrounded by homophobia (but not transphobia as your parents never even heard of the concept), so being gay is bad and I’m not bad so I can’t be gay. Then discovering the concept of transness, seeing it as an “out”, proving that you weren’t bad, there was a third option, so this must be real.
Psychologically this is valid, and I can imagine a psychologist coming from a good place trying to figure you out entirely before assigning a label that could result in more issues (like you said, it ain’t easy being trans).
Of course he could be a trans denying asshole too, that’s hard to tell from text.
And there’s obviously better phrasing to explore the possibility of you being gay instead of trans
In the second meeting we had I pointed to my genitals and said that these have to go. Dude looked super annoyed but that was it, the meeting was over and I got my referral.
That sounds like the exact thing you should do, that’s not something that can be denied (maliciously or otherwise) through internalized homophobia.
I get that it could be a valid reason, but I had already told him that I had been with guys but the dynamic was all wrong. The problem I have with sex in general is that I do not want to use my factory installed equipment as intended or at all, preferably. That’s why my ex wife kicked me out. I just couldn’t give her what she needed anymore. I told him all this, but he still said that I should gay it up more first. I had also told him that gay porn does nothing for me as there’s no one to identify with. That’s a big reason why I convinced myself I wasn’t gay but the attraction to guys were still there. I couldn’t get my head around why that was. Until I realized at the tender age of 55 that I’m actually a woman, of course. Being trans was just not on the map for me as I barely even knew that existed for most of my life.
He is quite known in the trans community as not being trans friendly and having outdated opinions.
Fairly sure if I was transgender, I would still be Lesbian, due to well, being brought up to see men as gross. Also, men kind of are gross, women are too, but to a lesser degree.
Hairs and smelly sweat are gross, and the man smell too, that’s the reason one woman is actually lesbian on here I hear.
Is it just me?
Not that it matters, since I can’t smell either most of the time.
I wrote a fucking poem to deal with this kinda shit. Let’s see if I can find it…
I think I deleted it after My surgery, but it started with:
I do not like My dick and balls
I do not like them, not at all
I’m so used to being around woke ppl that until I scrolled down to the comments, I thought the therapist was asking “why can’t you just be into women”. Then I realised people be transphobic
Your comment made me realize as well.
“Why can’t you be into women” is bad enough, but yikes 😬😬😬
“Why can’t you just be a competent therapist?”
Ex therapist id say
Yep. This is a core foundational level of respect that the therapist failed to grasp. Which calls into question every single piece of help they can provide. Their worldview is fucked up - and you will not get the help you deserve.
hard agree
Can’t wait to see @Lena@gregtech.eu’s entries in ratemytherapist or some other neutral/nuanced sites.
Time to fire the therapist
And request a refund 🤭
wow, I knew cis people were kinda dumb… but WOW that’s some of the dumbest shit i’ve ever heard
transphobic rhetoric
It’s become kind of a common talking point that trans women are “castrated gay men” in terf spaces. Really stupid if one knows that trans women can also like women.
Which is wild, because I feel like most trans women I meet are at least bi, but usually lesbians.but that is probably just the circles I run in.
My favorite example of transphobic logic.
- Would you kiss a trans woman?
“No that’s gay.”- Then would you kiss a trans man?
“No, that’s gay.”
My wife is dealing w/1 rn in a anarchist chat she intersects, esp. regarding this Dengist-Prop.
Change the therapist. It’s imporant for your therapist to really be on the same wavelength with you.
You will get much better results with a different therapist.
They’ll be a good therapist for someone other. But not a match for you.
It’s easy to react with shit like this when you are secretly bigoted inside your own head
I think if they say that then it’s no longer a secret
I need it that my therapist provokes an emotional reaction, so we can work with it. It’s his role to confront me, not to navigate around the issues and earn money for having a nice talk. It shouldn’t be in the first meeting though. There needs to be a basis of trust.
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